GlassAngel at Home

Is my wedding day! So have patience with me as my thoughts mostly turn to wedding planning (and finding a new job to pay for it) in the coming months. As craft projects get started and completed for the wedding I will post about them. I am currently working on the design of our pocket fold invited and the save the dates (STD's) have been printed for months. Soon it will be time to start addressing all the STD's so we are working hard on getting the guest list together.

I can feel the Kitchen Series winding down as I am having a hard time coming up with new topics, but I am sure there will be a few more post on it before I go back to my normal ramblings on cooking. I am hoping to start something interior design related soon as I can complete a few thoughts on it.

Please stick around to see what the next year holds!

Posted in: Craft, Decorating, General Life, In The Kitchen, Wedding on Friday, June 27, 2008 at 11:43 PM 0 comments    

Or not! I took my first trip to Las Vegas and just returned. My sister decided to get married in a very awesome chapel out there and have the reception in a house the two families rented. So that meant 6 days in a house with 5 kids and a lot of work to do for the reception. The weekend before we left I made her veil and I think it is really cute.

There was a ton of running around to do in the days before the wedding since we had to pic up all the food and prep it, find and buy the beer and wine, buy the flowers for me to arrange and pick up all the dishes at the party store. We got lost in Vegas many times in our attempts to get it all done and a great time was as by most.

She opted for cupcakes which my mom and a crafty friend made the stand for out of plates and candle sticks they found at thrift shops and glued together with aquarium glue. This pic is before the hanging beads were put on it but shows how cute it looks!


I didn't get any pics of my flower arrangements so I will have to wait till I get pics back from the lady who took some. I am also waiting to see pics from the ceremony. Now I am trying to get back into the swing of things and get all the laundry done.

There will be no Kitchen Series posts this week or next week since I leave in a few days to help my mom unload her moving trailer that will arrive from Phoenix in Minnesota on monday morning.

Posted in: Craft, General Life, Wedding on Friday, June 20, 2008 at 11:21 AM 0 comments    

So I had a awful night where I got no sleep (wow it's quiet at 4 am) and then was woken up early (ummm 7:30am, thanks Mom) by a phone call. So I thought today would be a good "research" day. So I spent some time doing a little blogroll reading. What you may ask is that? Well I go to some of the blogs I like to read and check out their blog rolls, the list of people they read. Sometimes I find the best things there so I thought I would show you a few of them today.

I tend to try and follow the FlyLady method for cleaning and organizing but ran acrossed this post from I'm a organizing junkie about How to get organized? Follow these PROCESS steps…. They are very sound and her PROCESS makes a lot of sense.

SimpleMom has a great article on Decorating:Using your skin that is part of her decorating while using your 5 senses as a guide. The entire series is really good. She also writes a great post about Home Management Logs and gives some building blocks for them. Her posts remind me of FlyLady in a more modified way, but a lot of the terms are the same. Her take on it is similar to what I have been trying to do so I can't wait to go back and read the whole series on it. She linked to D*I*Y Planners who have a large list of planner pages and setup info, think Franklin Covey but free and printed on your printer.

I also found a kick ass tutorial on making some cool bags on Kerri Made that I am so going to have to try...infact I am thinking they would make great gifts for my bridesmaids. I have a whole year to make 4 for them and 1 for me!

Also a interesting post on Is Recession Preparing a New Breed of Survivalist? has a good list of things to put in your emergency kit.

Want to take a class at MIT? You can now take webclasses from them at no charge. It is part of their Open Courseware Program. Only catch is you don't get college credit for it.

So what webites & blogs do you turn to for some fun stuff? Let me know in the comments so I can check them out too!

Posted in: Craft, Decorating, General Life, Website Report on Thursday, May 29, 2008 at 10:47 PM 0 comments    

But I am making a few changes this weekend. At times there may be things looking a little weird as I play with a new template. Hopefully things won't be at odds for too long.
I am also pondering a little change in blog name and direction. For so long it has only been about my bad choices in jobs and relationships and those things have partly changed. The current name "Please don't break the GlassAngel" reflected a uneasy feeling I had almost all of the time. Yes,I still do feel like that on occasion but it is not my everyday thing any more. The old saying "times change, people change" is really true and I feel like I have changed alot in the last year, mostly since I met my fiancee. So for this I think a change is needed. In with the old and out with the new, as they say. I am debating going back and taking out some older post that may be TMI, but I don't know if I should or not.
What do you think, should some of the older posts go? Leave a comment on your thought.

Posted in: General Life, Thought For The Day on Saturday, May 17, 2008 at 11:41 AM 0 comments    

5.2 earthquake rocks large region of Midwest

So that's what woke me up at 4:37am making me think I was crazy and my bed was not vibrating. They talk about the quake in 2002 and I remember that one clearly.

Posted in: General Life on Friday, April 18, 2008 at 9:20 AM 0 comments    

So I have been hunting and have found that there are no jobs currently in my area, in my field, with my skill set. Yes there are jobs in my field but they are either ones I am not qualified for (ie: not enough experience or wrong experience) or ones that I have done in the past and know I suck at (ie: full commission sales or high pressure sales) and know I will end up failing at. And at the current moment starting a job I know I am not cut out to handle is the last thing I can do...it will put me right over the edge. But I have applied for them...and even they didn't call me back since right now there are a ton of people looking for jobs. I know I am not the only person going thru this as I look at the field related job boards and see 5-10 people all looking for "my" job. My last boss is even looking as the company I was "let go" from has basically gone under.

My frustration and depression levels are at a all time high for as of the end of June my unemployment benefits will run out. I feel completely disillusioned in my field. I worked so hard to get my degree (I am a horrible student with my dyslexia) and I have at the current moment nothing to show for all of my hard work then and since. I am literally hating the fact that I even spent the money (which I am still paying back while unemployed) to now realise that while I am ok at what I do I hate it. I'm scared because my track record shows that I am really bad at picking jobs..every time I find one it is either a lie or something I am really not good at.

So tomorrow I will start what used to be the unthinkable and begin applying at all the places I can find that are hiring. Starbucks, Lowe's and Target will be the first ones. I have to find something cause I have used up all my reserves and have nothing to fall back on. Rob doesn't understand because his family just supports him even though he has been unemployed for a year and still lives at home. Me I have been on my own since I was in college. My family can give me emotional support, but no other help.

I just want to cry...I just want to not have to do this again. I feel like I am just hitting my head on the same fucking wall and it is doing nothing but beating my brain to mush. I'm tired and want to crawl in bed and sleep, just sleep; but I know I can't do that or I will never get back out again.

Posted in: General Life on Wednesday, April 9, 2008 at 11:33 PM 0 comments    

...and starting to get bored. I have been unable to find anything and it is pissing me off. This week I really need to hit it ard because the end of unemployment is going to come faster than it should. We (R and all his familiy) just returned from our Jamaican Vacation and that is making it harder than ever to get back into it. I'm going to have to start doing the unthinkable and start looking out side my field for work. At the moment though that doesn't seem like such a bad idea when I seem to have such bad luck picking jobs in my field.

Wedding stuff has come to a standstill since there is np money to pay for anything. I have been doing some hunting for misc stff and have some good ideas for things we will be needing.

Posted in: General Life on Tuesday, April 8, 2008 at 1:59 PM 0 comments    

I know, I know. I disappeared for a long time there. Lots of things have happened since my last post in July. Then I was struggling with R being out of town. so let Me kind of do a recap of what has happened since then.

August & September:
Dead.... that was how work was I sat around doing nothing much for 2 months
Relationship.... Strong! we saw each other all of the time and had way too may family (his) obligations to meet.
Weight loss... HA what weight loss?!
After all the apartment hoopla (leaking roof, coming into my apartment when I'm not home) I decided to move and find a cute condo closer to work and closer to R. R's best friend lets me take over his condo as he is looking for a house.

October:
I GOT ENGAGED! yes you read that right he popped the question on our 5 month anniversary at the same restaurant that we went to our first date at. I find a dress I love and start looking at reception halls.
Life continues to be hectic with family obligations. And work starts to pick up.

November:
I took the FIL's to see the garden and reception hall I wanted and had shown R. Work is now crazy and I start working from 7am to 6-7pm. And the family obligations continue.

December:
Work is kicking my ass and I continue to work crazy hours and almost every weekend. We book the reception hall and I am thinking about one hundred other wedding things in any free moment of the day.

AND of course there are those family obligations. Which I now can't handle any more and R and I have a huge fight about what is happening for the Xmas and new years holidays. He tells me that we can do one thing and then goes along with the opposite thing that his family wants to do. After an huge sit down we solve this issue and the family obligations that I have to attend lowers dramatically.

January:
Well the month starts out ok then wham I come down with the flu and when i go back to work after 2 days of hurling I am told the company, because of it's money issues can no longer afford my salary and they are sorry but they will have to let me go. Effective immediately.

So here I sit, back because now my very busy work life has come to a screeching halt and I need something to keep me from going off the deep end. I know that this was for the best, since the boss was really hating me lately for unknown reasons. He had started tormenting me in the way I had seen him do to countless others that he suddenly, overnight decided to hate.

Now I will update my resume and start calling a ton of places...but I think I will take a few days off first to get over this flu and figure out what I want to do. I can't take long at it though since my savings is nothing and unemployment won't cover my bills. But at least till next week when I will hit the pavement hard.

Posted in: General Life, Wedding on Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 9:14 AM 0 comments    

My alone time has made me start to think...I'm sure in a very unhealthy way.

But with the inability to speak to him to assure myself that everything is cool all I can do is try and tell myself this is true, that this time it will work. All of the doubts I normally don't have time to even think about have hit me full force today. The almost paralyzing fear that I will screw this relationship up too with my moodiness, inability to hold my temper or to compromise when I feel things should go my way.

The thought that we fell to hard to fast is always in the back of my mind. Making me wonder if this is real, or just all in my mind. How can someone become so important, so ingrained in me in such a short amount of time? How do I know this is real...that what I feel isn't just extreme gratefulness that someone actually wants me,just as I am. How do I trust that he means it when he says it, when everyone else has taken it back, when they learned what I was really like.

Add to that the intimacy issue and you have a train wreck in my mind. My brain races thinking that some how that issue is my fault....or worse yet that is signals that he really doesn't want me as much as he says he does. I don't think I could take it if it was the last one...that would be such a crushing blow to my self esteem.

I know this is just me missing him desperately....but it doesn't help that it is all stuff that is in the back of my mind. My logical brain is saying that if all this stuff is coming out the first break I have from him it means I should slow things down a little.

When I am with him I feel loved...I feel like he would do anything to make me happy. I know I would do the same for him, but I always feel like I am not giving enough...like he is doing more. I'm oh so happy when I am with him...and counting the minutes when I am not.

I don't want to feel all this doubt...but I'm not sure how not too. Why does my brain always track to the unhappy...why can't it just let me be happy?

Posted in: General Life on Wednesday, July 25, 2007 at 9:02 PM 0 comments    

So R left early Saturday morning with the rest of his family on their Mexico trip. I had a really hard time Saturday (since I was still at his house, in his room) till I went to the family picnic that I had to drive back home for. I managed all day sunday by burring myself first in a big target house stuff spending spree(ahhhh retail therapy) and then came home and stuck my nose in the new Harry Potter book until it was time to go to bed.

Today at work there were a few bad time... especially when I realized it was 2 and I had had no calls or texts all day, but for the most part I was just too busy to think about it. After work I went and fed & played with the dogs at his house for a few hours then wrestled my new desk (made by the guys at work) up the stairs with the help of a neighbour. I then spent the rest of the evening putting it together and putting things in it.

Then as I'm sitting here debating going to bed it happens...my phone rings. It's him. He says the phone card only has a few min on it and asks me how F (his best friend who is staying at the house with the dogs) and the dogs are. I say we are all fine, just missing them. He says ok I have to go and I tell him I love him. He says it back, says bye and then hangs up....and that is why I want to cry.

Posted in: General Life on Monday, July 23, 2007 at 10:04 PM 0 comments    

Work is dead as a door nail, and has been for a couple of weeks. So I have been doing all the things people do when they are bored at work....blog reading and writing, myspace and other web surfing. Today I just want to leave...to go and have a little mini vacation from everyone and everything. Well ok lets be honest...not everythingjust leave me a book, chocolate and something to drink that will make me happy. Instead I will put on my happy face and go to a cookout tommorrow. FUUUUUN!

I talked to the Bride yesterday for a min and she is going crazy with it only being 8 days till the wedding. As of yet her MOH has not picked up her dress and brought it to be altered. Yes I know crazy huh that 8 days before and she hasn't got her dress yet. If I was the Bride I would be telling her she was out of the wedding. I mean come on, we ordered these things in December and were told that we would have to pay the 2nd half on them in march....it is now July. How hard is it to come up with the money in 6 months?!

Posted in: General Life on Friday, July 6, 2007 at 9:37 AM 0 comments    

Yesterday was spent being actively lazy....meaning I really did nothing, but I wasn't at home.

Tuesday night R came and stayed at my house in the city for the first time. The Cat didn't bother him as much as he thought it would so I hope this can become a more regular thing, since the privacy at his house is a little lacking for my taste.

Then in the morning we were up and out to go to the Elmwood Park parade that was a 1/2 hour late in starting so it took forever to get done with. While we waited I got to play with R's brother's new puppy, a Chug (a chuawua (sp?) pug mix), who is just too cute for words. After a short beer run we ended up at R's brother's house (he has the pool) for the family cook out. After much eating and swimming we struck out to the Elmwood Park Freedom Fest to see the fireworks. The fireworks were awesome lasting 30 non-stop minutes. The food I tried was good, but really not good for me at all. After that we went back to R's house and I came to work today from there so I didn't have to get up as early.

Tonight we have a cook demonstration to go to that is being put on by a friend of his that is in culinary school. Hopefully he makes something really good! Saturday we have another family cook out to go to,so I will have more time to not eat well this weekend.

In other news....

Last weekends cook out with the Bride (see right) & Groom went really well. They really seemed to like R and R loved them. We ended up going to see a AAA semi-pro football game of the team groom plays on (but he messed up his knee so he was doing the play-by-play announcing) that took forever to get started and over with. After the whole cake thing, I was a little worried about how the weekend was going to go, but it went really well. R's step-dad did a little bit of picking...which seems to be SOP, that I couldn't handle so I made him go to town with R and leave me alone for a while.

Now I think I best get to work...since I haven't done any yet!

Posted in: General Life on Thursday, July 5, 2007 at 9:17 AM 0 comments    

No time for a really long thing...life is still making me crazy...but atleast I didn't gain anything again!


So total so far:
Week 1: -1.5 lbs
Week 2: -1.5 lbs
Week 3: +2 lbs
Week 4: -2 lbs
Week 5: -.5 lbs
Week 6: +3.5 lbs
Week 7: -1 lb
Week 8: 0 lbs
Total lost: 0 lbs

Posted in: General Life on at 9:12 AM 0 comments    

OK so I have been planning for 2 weeks a couples only weekend at the bf's stepdad's trailer in WI with my best friend & her fiancee (who's wedding I am in in 2 weeks) so that R and them could get to know each other before the wedding. Last week before I finalized everything with her I made him check that NO ONE else was going to be there. I was told no one would be there.

Then Wednesday I find out that not only will his step dad be there...but HIS son and the son's 3 kids will be there! I was upset...but worked the plan so we would have tents for us and the other couple so we don't have to sleep in the trailer with the kids/dad's. I was still a little upset that we would have kids running around while we were doing our drinking/bonfire thing. In my family there is NO, I mean no drinking around kids, period, but his family does it, so I let that go. I mean it is not his fault that the step dad forgot we were going to be there this weekend and told his son he could come up.

So last night I made this super awesome Triple Chocolate Bundt cake that takes forever to bake, to add to the cookout that we are now having with everyone, not just my friends on saturday evening. This morning I had R come pick it up and take it home so I wouldn't have to worry about someone trying to mess with it where I work (since he is picking me up right from work to go north). Well turns out his mom asked him if she could have some AND HE SAID YES! and so they cut in to my cake! I am so pissed right now, that I can't even talk to him! I can't believe he thought it "would be ok". I mean it was made FOR TOMMORROW'S COOKOUT not for today, just because "it looks good".

Yes I know it is just a stupid cake...but it is the whole thing...the kids, and the cake and the no control over the lovely weekend I had planned. Yes I love the man and his devotion to his family is one thing that makes me really love him. BUT we do at least one thing, if not 2, with his family every weekend, and then the family dinner at least 1 night a week. I mean how can you not when he still lives at home. This was to be a nice "away from his family for a change" weekend and now things are just really fucked!

I really at this moment want to just go home and go to bed, but I can't because I have company coming to the trailer and I need to be there. I sat here at my desk trying not to cry for about 15 min, and then I spent another 25 wanting to punch something because when I tried to explain how upset I was he didn't get it. So now I'm writing because I need to really calm down before I get in the car with him in 20 min and am stuck there for the next 2 hours. I also need to let it go so I can have fun this weekend with friends who I only see once in a while. I have a tendency, once things don't go my way/as planned to stay mad for a loooong time (see above about going to bed) thus ruining any fun I might have had if I could just let it go.

And now I'm back to wanting to cry again.

(yes I know I have anger management issues)

Posted in: General Life on Friday, June 29, 2007 at 3:43 PM 0 comments    

I know I have become a bad blogger again...only telling what is going on after it has long passed. So here I go again....

Saturday I went to a graduation party with R & family. (pic of me and R to left) We had some fun, drank a little (since we weren't driving) and had a lot more fun when we got home. Hard to imagine someone can become so important to me in such a short time, but it has happened. He said the "l" word again and without even thinking I said it back. I meant it...so it wasn't a problem I said it...I just didn't mean to say it so soon.

Sunday again with R and family I went to the south side to a street fair. R and his brother hit it hard and I got to see how R is when he is really trashed...it was a eye opening experience. I didn't drink since I was the DD, but still ended up with a migraine that put me in bed most of Monday.

Posted in: General Life on Tuesday, June 26, 2007 at 10:26 AM 2 comments    

Well I lost 1 lb of the 3.5 lbs I gained last week...still not getting all my work outs in during the week and eating with R's family is still killing me on the weekends. I have been on this gain/lose of the same 5lbs for a month or so now and it is starting to piss me off big time!

So total so far:
Week 1: -1.5 lbs
Week 2: -1.5 lbs
Week 3: +2 lbs
Week 4: -2 lbs
Week 5: -.5 lbs
Week 6: +3.5 lbs
Weel 7: -1 lb
Total lost: 0 lbs

Posted in: General Life on at 10:15 AM 2 comments    

So my monthy visitor is kickin my ass right now.....

So total so far:
Week 1: -1.5 lbs
Week 2: -1.5 lbs
Week 3: +2 lbs
Week 4: -2 lbs
Week 5: -.5 lbs
Week 6: +3.5 lbs
Total lost: 0 lbs

How is tat for really bad!

Posted in: General Life on Tuesday, June 19, 2007 at 8:27 AM 6 comments    

Last week was major busy. Tuesday and wednesday Coworker R and my direct boss went and spent some time at Neocon. There was some upheaval at work that changed who my boss actually is, so that was fun. I completed and went live with most of the work website...but I still have a ton of stuff to do for the salesman. So I will be working on that this week.

R and I went to the wedding on saturday, it was a ton of fun. I wore the brown dress I already had, but bought new shoes and accessories. A ton of pics were taken so as soon as I see a few I will post them.

Then on sunday we vegged till it was time to go to Little Italy to celebrate Father's Day for his step dad. There was a festival going on and I bought a cool new ring
and a cute necklace

We ate at a really great restaurant...like always. It was fun and I really love his family. Someone asked again how long we had been together again..and we both drew a blank so I looked it up and it has only been 5 weeks...it is hard to imagine getting this attached to someone so fast. I mean we are talking about things we will be doing in a year...and that is a little scary cause it mean we each are thinking we will still be together then. He has been good about the "love you's" but he did say it again this weekend, and I almost said it back. But I still think it is too soon even if I think it might be true.

I am tuckered out right now...it is hard to sleep with him cause he likes to hug me all night, which I am so not used to so I find it hard to sleep. I slept like a rock last night after I got home, but I think I will be taking it easy tonight.

Posted in: General Life on Monday, June 18, 2007 at 10:35 AM 0 comments    

Things are way hectic around here right now. So all I can say is week 5 is only down .5lb...better than nothing I say!

So total so far:
Week 1: -1.5 lbs
Week 2: -1.5 lbs
Week 3: +2 lbs
Week 4: -2 lbs
Week 5: -.5 lbs
Total lost: 3.5 lbs

Posted in: General Life on Tuesday, June 12, 2007 at 6:36 PM 3 comments    

Well week 4 wasn't so bad...

I did all of my work outs and lost the 2lbs I gained the week before...but no more weight lost for the challenge.

So total so far:
Week 1: -1.5 lbs
Week 2: -1.5 lbs
Week 3: +2 lbs
Week 4: -2 lbs
Total lost: 3 lbs

Posted in: General Life on Tuesday, June 5, 2007 at 8:33 AM 2 comments